itherese Leung’s blog

When I was in Hong Kong, I liked a frozen yogurt place a lot. The frozen yogurt I loved was the fruit-blended kind. As I was a poor student back then, I could not afford to have it very often, and therefore, it was always a great enjoyment every time I had it.

Then I came to the United States. Frozen yogurt here usually means the soft serve yogurt (we call it soft ice cream in Hong Kong). When I first started working in the City, one day I wanted some ice cream suddenly and my coworker brought me to an ice cream place where I saw the blended kind of frozen yogurt the first time in this continent. Shoot! I just missed it so much! I got one without second thought. It was so good! However, it was expensive too. Although I like it a lot, I just do not feel comfortable spending that much on an after-meal treat without a special reason like celebrating a birthday (especially when I am trying hard to save up).

Since then, I started looking for other places for this frozen yogurt. It is in fact my fortune that I work in the City. There are actually some places that offer very good frozen yogurt in the City, but they are just not the blended kind that I like. A week ago, when I surf on the web for frozen yogurt (again), I found out that there was a new place in the neighborhood of my office which featured the blended frozen yogurt. Its price for a small cup was similar to that in Hong Kong, which means it was much reasonable than the first place I went. From that moment on, I have been wanting to get a cup from there. However, as one of my coworkers was leaving us for advancing his career, I did not want to miss another lunch with him, therefore I have been eating out everyday, and which means I have been spending a lot of $$ and in-taking too much energy. Besides, I was going to my cousin’s wedding on last Saturday, I did not want to put more weight on my tummy so I could not fit into the dress, I did not get it even I wanted it so much.

Today, the last day of June, when my saving for the month has been set and a new pay check has arrived. When it is the very last day of my coworker and the first day I get back to work after my cousin’s wedding, it is the time. I was thinking of the frozen yogurt all day long, especially after I have done with the jobs that I was assigned, my mind was just devoted to my beloved frozen yogurt. I could not wait for another day. I wished I could try it out with my boyfriend, but I could not stand anymore. I was too tempted. I must get it. I decided.

The place is not really close to where I work. It takes approximately 20 minutes of walk. When I got out of the office building, I was all excited. I walked as fast as I was going to catch the last train of a night. I was as excited as I was going to meet my best old friend who I have been missing for have of my life. As I was approaching the mall where the creamery is located at, I have got complicated feelings. I slowed down my steps, deep breathed, tried hard to calm myself down. I did not want to look too excited. When I stoped at the end of the half-dozen people line, I looked at the menu on the wall, just to make sure the price. I already knew what I was going to order before I got there (this is unusual). I already had the line of order just waiting to be spoken. Here came my turn. When the girl behind the counter asked me what did I want, I just spoke out my line. I could choose two ingredients to blend with the yogurt, my choices were strawberry and Oreo chips. However, the girl said that I could not get the Oreo blended with the yogurt, but only put on top as a topping, as it would stuck in the machine. Okay, then strawberry and banana were fine. I did not really think it would stuck in the machine, as I had strawberry blended with Nestle Crunch bar everytime I had it in Hong Kong. Believe me, it was fabulous. Anyway, I did not get the Oreo, but banana, which I think it would be better without. I got choices of low-fat, fat-free and no sugar added yogurt, and I got the no sugar added, as I like the original taste of yogurt. I was looking forward to a slightly sour taste but it didn’t tasted as what I imagined. Instead, it was a little bitter. Overall the taste was not as good as those I got in Hong Kong, but it wasn’t bad. With its reasonable price, this is the place I get my treats when I really crave for one.

Speaking of prices,  normally I am not willing to pay more than three bucks for to-go frozen yogurt for myself. I am not a fan of toppings on frozen yogurt. Just give me a plain one. However when there is someone sharing (the joy) with me, I am willing to pay more for greater taste and greater joy.

The yogurt place I went today is Yogen Fruz, reviews below -
http://www.yelp.com/biz/yogen-fruz-san-francisco

This is another place for soft serve. It is a tiny cafe without fancy decoration, but their frozen yogurt is REAL good, they worth the ratings -
http://www.yelp.com/biz/caffe-ambrosia-san-francisco

There is such a teaching in the Bible, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” (Matthew 5:44). Enemies hurt us, they wish us ill, why would we love them?

For those who do not believe in Jesus, this is just nonsense. And if I were one, this teachings would even have scared me away. The situation would be like the rich man who ran away sad when Jesus asked him to sell all he had for the poor (Mark 10:17-22).

That sounds unaccomplishable. That is just too hard.

That made me think. I asked myself, why would I accept this? Was that “because he said so”?

I think that different people have different reasons to believe in Jesus. For me, it is his teaching and manifestation of Love. He teaches us what love is. He died for us when we were still sinners. We had never deserved this love. This is what love is about. For God “makes his sun rise on the bad and the good, and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust”(Matthew 5:45), He does not love according to our good, but he loves us all no matter what. If he only love those who deserve, Jesus would never have come. This is what true love is. I am not saying that loving someone means dying for them, but its unconditionality. We hope to be loved. Maybe by parents, family, friends, colleagues, boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, children, etc. If we are loved according to how good we are, we will be fearful all the time. Because we are not perfect. We will be afraid that we would lose somebody’s love due to our faults. This is so sad. How can we have peace in this so-called ‘Love’? Jesus teaches us the nature of love, the true meaning of love. “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” This is the love that we can really rest in. The love that can truly bring unity.

For Jesus has loved me when I was still a sinner, for I hope to be loved, I want to spread the love.

Like faith, love needs works. Sometimes when we are angry, disappointed by someone, we might forget what love is and turn to a mind of revenge. This is one of the humans’ evil nature. That is why we need to practice, make it a nature of ourselves, and keep it. However, without God’s help, we can hardly exercise it.

God, help me to love, as you have loved me.

When someone take advantage of us, take the occasion to practice love.

So what happened when all those questions popped up in my head? (please refer to my last post if you have no idea what I am talking about)

I asked my teacher. She opened the Bible and read it with me the stories before and after the calling of the disciples (Mark 1:16-20). The answer was: They did not know. They did not know that Jesus was the one yet. They found Him a wise man and a good teacher thus followed Him. While they were following Him, they listened to his teachings, they witnessed his miracles and power, they saw how He treated the sinners and the poor, then they believed. Although they believed, they still had doubts (they were really frustrated after Jesus died but before He rose again). They fully believe that Jesus was the Christ who truly came and saved people after they witnessed Jesus’ resurrection AND consistently praying to and relying on the Holy Spirit.

Faith is a life-long journey. At the beginning I heard of Him. From his stories, and other believers’ lives, I knew he taught good. From teachings of the Church and my family, I heard that He was God, He saved us from sins, He brought us reconciliation with God our heavenly father, etc. I accepted and I believed. I have experienced God in my life, but I still have a lot of questions, I still be anxious when things are not working out as I desire, I still worry when I cannot see the future clearly.

Faith is a life-long journey. It does not end when we recognize Him. It is just a start. Faith needs to be practiced, it needs to be strengthened. God gives us a lot of tests in the journey for us to exercise our faith. We enhance it by consistently seeking Him, knowing Him, trusting Him and relying Him.

There is a long way ahead of me. I pray to God that I can always have faith and live out my belief.

Recently I have been thinking about my belief.

I did not really remember how I started believing, because I was raised in a Catholic environment, God hasn’t been a stranger to me since the first day I was born. When I was a teenager, I participated actively in religious communities, both at church and at school. One day, a non-Christian schoolmate asked me, “You believe in God is that because people told you that it was true since you were small?” I thought for a bit, then I said ‘yes’.

After that I started thinking. Was that the reason? Later I found it was not the reason, but the seed. I am always grateful about my parents had seeded this belief on my life. I believe that God has plan for each individual, for each of his precious creatures. Each of us encounter God in different times, in different ways, as many ways as we can never imagine. I first encountered Him in my family.

As I grew up, I started to have questions. I doubted, I wanted to know more. As I studied in Catholic school, I had Religious Study class (simply saying, Bible class) in my syllabus. I heard a lot of stories and teachings of Jesus from the class. When we read that Jesus’ first twelve disciples gave up their families and all their belongings to follow Jesus immediately when they were called, we appreciated them, we complimented their spontaneous replies to God’s calling. However, I did not understand. I appreciated them too, I wanted to be like them, but I did not understand how would they do that. For so many false prophecy at that time (many claimed that they were Christ who came to save the Israels from Romans), how could they know that Jesus was really the one, just at the moment when Jesus called them? They did not have the Bible which told them that Jesus was going to die for us and raise from death because those had not happened yet. So what made them believe that they were not fooled?

Let me continue tomorrow.

(I find it so difficult to write long passages, especially in English. One of the purpose of this blog is to practice my writing skills, therefore I try my best to write in English although it is much easier to express my ideas in my mother language. So please pardon me if it isn’t written well, and please correct me if any mistake is found. Thank you very much.)

Some people afraid of conflicts, and they choose to suppress their feelings in exchange for harmony.

I like harmony too, but I am also honest to myself. Because at the end of the day, I am the one who bear the consequences of all the choices I make.

How to achieve both harmony and honesty? Communication is key. Effective one needs skills, which have to be learned.

Before I wrote my first post in this blog, I actually have played around with the themes for a while. I browsed the online theme library, and it took me quite some time to pick this one out.

I like it simple, yet clear.

This is another assignment for me to train my faith to God.

Last Thursday when I visited my mom, I told her that I had been going to church with my boyfriend, to ‘his’ church, which was the church that he had been participating for years. This news turned into a big fuss immediately.
Right before the outbreak of the news, we were happy, peaceful, respectful. Right after that, I became all evil, and I broke her heart totally.

I was upset too. The sad thing was, we were just chatting happily, suddenly it came to the end of the world. I was disappointed. I was worried. Especially when sister confronted me on the phone from the other side of the Pacific Ocean, saying that the family would abandon me.

I ask God, what is it evil to seek Him in another way? What is it evil to be different from my parents?

There are a lot of things matter in life. Among all, love is what really matters.
Love brings people together. Love heals broken heart. Love brings reconciliation. Love changes the world. Love overcomes obstacles. Love never fails.

What could get in the way of two persons who love each other?
I love my family, and my family loves me too. What could tear us apart?

This is my faith to God.

“Love never fails.
If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing; if tongues, they will cease; if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing. For we know partially and we prophesy partially, but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. When I was a child, I used to talk as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I became a man, I put aside childish things. At present we see indistinctly, as in a mirror, but then face to face. At present I know partially; then I shall know fully, as I am fully known.
So faith, hope, love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”
(1 Corinthians 13:8-13)